Smart Security Saves Time????

As most of you probably know, I have began my journey across the world via a short stay in Richmond, Virginia and Atlanta, Georgia. In two days I was on 4 separate flights and conquered the mass chaos of 4 different airports created by overzealous engineers who for some reason can not figure out an easier way to design airports...but I digress.

My husband and I for reasons unbeknown to myself GREATLY over packed for our holiday travels (lengthy as my stay was I doubt that I really needed 7 different t-shirts and 2 long-sleeved t-shirts!). On top of my poorly executed packing, we also received Christmas gifts and acquired other random items during our 43 day stint of homelessness. Fortunately, for myself we got an entire new luggage set as a Christmas present from Andrew's parents so we now own quality luggage with 4-point wheels...they are really awesome. In spite of the luggage's awesomeness and massive size all of our stuff simply did not fit. To facilitate more things fitting in my luggage I got very clever with my packing and put small things like cords/socks/gloves/jewelry in side of my 10 (YES 10!) different pair of shoes. In addition, I had random Christmas presents to pack: 4 different cooking thermometers (a probe, 2 regular meet thermometers, and a candy/frying thermometer), a pastry blender, a Texas shaped platter, matching TX cups and a cookie scoop.

Now, I am sure that these things must have looked rather odd to the TSA personnel screening my checked baggage, so it was no surprise to me when I got to Atlanta, opened my bags and saw the notice from the TSA that my baggage was inspected. What did surprise me was the TSA's catchphrase that was printed on the bottom of said notice, "Smart Security Saves Time".

Saves time????? HOW??? How does all this security save me time???? Don't get me wrong I am pleased that they checked my luggage...after all there was plenty of odd items in my baggage and I hope that they thoroughly check all odd baggage items they find. I feel just fine with them rummaging through my stuff, Joe the plumber's stuff, granny's stuff, Alli Baba's stuff, Cpt. Fair's stuff and any other person's baggage that may contain suspicious items.

But, lets re-think our marketing slogan? I was no marketing major but, I can come up with several better slogans than smart security saves time! How about "Smart Security Saves LIVES!"

Dear TSA,

Please chose a better slogan!

Love,

Angie

Murphy's Law

Dang it, if everytime my husband goes away for some sort of training if something doesn't go wrong with the car, the a/c, the dog, something! Today on my way to meet my parents for dinner I heard a, "knock, knock" and then the light on my dashboard informed me that my right front tire pressure needed to be checked, then I felt the truck start to lean. Oh great...a flat tire!!! In a true display of Army wifery (Army wifery: the art of learning to be both the man and woman and thus be competent in taking care of what I like to call "man jobs.") I call my Dad to see where he is but, alas they have already sat down to dinner. Then I think....aha!...USAA has an included roadside assistance in my insurance policy. So I get in my planner where my insurance card was to find the phone number to call and what do you think happened? A gust of wind came out of nowhere (on an otherwise seemingly windless day) and blew the insurance card out of my hands underneath the truck! I waited for another gust of wind to blow it out from underneath the truck, but as I already explained, no wind was to be found! I had to crawl underneath the truck to get that dang insurance card. Never the less, USAA rather, Pop-a-lock, saved the day by changing my airless tire.

Note to self: stop being a spoiled brat and learn to change a tire!

Everybody dies famous in a small town...

This past weekend I got together with a group of old high school friends. We don't get together all that often but when we do its amazing how the 8 years we've been apart sort of dwindles and all of a sudden we are just older more mature high schoolers...the same exact friends we were 8 years ago! It is always so much fun to relive the years of yore and giggle like old friends always do. The older I become the more fondly I remember my high school experience and appreciate the many opportunties afforded to me in that tiny one-horse town. Reminiscing on old time stories of when we were 5, 8 and 18 brought back many good....and not so good memories. Remembering stories about that time we painted "Roast the Buffaoes" on our homecoming banner instead of Buffaloes, reminsicing on old high school flings, who we liked or disliked and of course I am particular fond of the story of how Ashlee got a black eye "running through a cornfield."

At the time Granger high school seemed like the most hostile and horrible place to be forced to attend...everybody always knew your business, who you were dating, what car you were driving and the amount of money in your bank account. Now I can say I am fond of my high school experience and am grateful for the many friendships formed and the bonds that will always keep us and our memories close to my heart.

Here's to you class of 2002!

Top Gun meets Texas Tech

My brother-in-law, David, went to Texas Tech which leads to some good ol' fashioned rivalry related ribbing. Fortunately for myself, Tech is so easy to make fun!

Anyhow, my sister sent this e-mail to me and I am not a big e-mail forwarding fan but this is too funny!

Gerald Meyers (Tech AD): "Coach Leach, did you order the Code Shed?"

Kent Hance (Tech Chancellor): "You don't have to answer that question!"

Coach Leach: "I'll answer the question!" [to Meyers]

Coach Leach: "You want answers?" Meyers: "I think I am entitled." Coach Leach: "You want answers?"

Meyers: "I want the truth!"

Coach Leach: "You can't handle the truth!" [pauses]

Coach Leach: Son, we live in a world that has sidelines, and those sidelines have to be guarded by pirates with swords. Whose gonna do it? You? You, Meyers? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for James, and you curse the Pirates. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know - That James shed incident, while tragic, probably won games. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, wins games. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties with your fat little girlfriends, you want me on those sidelines, you need me on those sidelines We implement things like going for it on 4th down in our own territory, using time outs poorly, and trying to draw the defense off sides on 4th down. We use these as the backbone of a life spent winning games. You use them as a punch line. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very bowl games that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way - Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a sword, and stand at post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to -

Meyers: "Did you order the Code Shed?"

Coach Leach: "I did the job!" Meyers: "Did you order the Code Shed?"

Coach Leach: "You're G**damned right I did!"

Final moving day....a bit delayed

OK, OK, so maybe its more than just "a bit" delayed. Its nearly been a month, but really I have a good excuse: I haven't had wireless internet to connect my computer to. So here it is the long awaited conclusion of my series: "How To Move: The Army Wife Way."

Step 1: Take anything off the top of cabinets and in the top cabinets b/c the movers will not pack anything they can not reach from the ground.


Step 2: Pack all your clothes in odor blocking trash bags with a dryer sheet tucked in each to keep your clothes smelly freshy during the journey. Plus, I really never relish the idea of a big smelly, mover dude digging through my pantie drawer.
Step 3: Pack your silverware and other kitchen utensils in large ziploc bags because otherwise the movers will wrap each individual piece of silverware which takes FOREVER to unpack.
Step 4: Put everything you do not want the movers to pack in a bathroom with a post note on the door that reads, "Nothing in her goes!" Inevitably, the movers will still ask you if anything in that room needs to go despite the clearly written note.Step 5 - Sleep on an air mattress or rough it like Andrew and I did and just sleep in sleeping bags (the dog was so happy, so happy in fact she put some white substance on my nose...or wait, maybe that was my husband). Use rubbermaid containers to transport anything that may need to travel through the elements in the back of a truck (they also work nicely as a dinner table or wine glass holder table).