Child Rearing

I have been thinking alot about how I am going to raise my children lately, for obvious reasons but also because I saw this bizarro couple on an HGTV show called Clean Sweep.  The minimal choice of television shows aired on AFN leads, Andrew and myself to watch shows that I may or may not have watch back in the states.  Last Saturday morning, the AFN tv show lineup was particularly lacking which lead me to watch a show about an incredibly interesting couple who were border line hoarders.  To make a long story short the husband refused to get ready of anything leading to a ridiculously dirty (I mean disgusting!) house.  After four years of marriage he refused to share half of the closet and  left all of her clothes/things just lying around the house.  The couple had an 18 month old son, the Mom slept with the son and made her husband sleep on the couch.  The kid had a "nursery" which was filthy, it did have a crib but they claimed he didn't like the crib.  To make a longstory short this couple got me thinking at great lenghts about what I plan to do and not do in the rearing of our children. 

I will start this by saying that everybody is free to raise their children as they please and the choices you make are well....your own chocies.  These are a few of my own thoughts, not intended to offend anybody who is choosing to raise a child/already raised a child/ or was raised differently than I plan to.  With that said, I would also like to say that these are my plans and do hope that through great prayer and with an open heart the Lord will help show me the way He intends me to raise His children.

First and foremost, I intend to put my husband first!  I know that it is probably so easy to put every need of your child above those of your husband.  I simply can not fathom the great love and bond that is between a Mother and her child and I can see how it would be easy to put the child first in all things and your marriage second.  I personally believe that there is no greater gift you can give a child than a happy, healthy home life and marriage.  Marriage is hard work and just because you have kids doesn't mean that the work on your marriage should cease.  I simply can not imagine sleeping with your child and not your husband!  If kids are always in your bed, how are you supposed to keep the intimate relationship that is so important in marriage alive?  I don't get it.  So with that, my first pledge is to keep our marriage bed, just that OUR marriage bed, no kiddos allowed!  Beyond, the 3-4 month point when the baby outgrows the bassinet and is sleeping through most of the night, it is my plan to keep the baby in the nursery! 

Secondly, I pledge not to be too overprotective.  Now, this is the one I will probably need help with!  I am seriously protective of my dog, so I can hardly imagine what it is going to be like when I have a real, life child!  People have been raising children for years!  Years and years, without books, manuals, studies, and monthly Doctor appointments.  I think it is going to be ok if you give the baby rice cereal before 4 months of age!  And it is probably not necessary to check what books say before doing every little thing.  Somebody, please remind me that I said this in a year!

I don't want to be that crazy parent who won't do things that are beneficial for the development of the child simply because I want to keep them a baby.  I am sure the time they are little is precious and expeditious but the cycle of life is for the child to grow and become big and strong...why would you wish them to stay a baby?  That is unnatural!

Finally, breastfeeding.  I definitely want to breastfeed.  I will probably need some encouragement, because I am sure that the idea of formula will seem quite convenient, especially when going to public places.  I am a private person and I just can not picture myself breastfeeding in public, so some encouragement to pump and plan ahead will likely be needed.  My goal is to make it to 6 months, but if I make it to 12 months (and I hope I do) somebody please remind me that is old enough to quit!  Breastfeeding an 18 month old like on the TV show I watched this weekend, just seems for lack of a better word....gross.  At 12 months you can switch to whole milk and so somebody please remind me! 

Fair Family Update!

SURPRISE (to us all!)  we are expecting a new addition to our family!  After a couple of long weeks filled with days and days of prayer we are happy to annouce that we are expecting a baby sometime around December 16.  This is how we told our family: we compiled the pictures into a PowerPoint slideshow and sent it in an e-mail attachment....I think they were a little shocked!

 

OK, four counting the dog!